I haven’t spent much of my life alone. I’ve been a mom since I was 19, and have only had my children spent 3 weeks away since then. Never being alone doesn’t mean you aren’t ever lonely though. I’ve been in crowded rooms and felt loneliness before.
Being lonely often happens at moments you don’t expect and there’s no telling how long it will stick around. Loneliness is a lot about feelings and emotions, but often there is truth to them.
In a world full of technology and busyness to the extreme, we have a hard time “squeezing in” time for people…time to build relationships. There is always something we have to do, want to watch or we’re exhausted from all we’ve already done. All of these scenarios have places where we have moments in which we can find ourselves lonely. Shopping is more fun with someone else, but we were in too much of a hurry to ask a friend along. Laughter is twice as fun and loud when a friend is watching a movie with you. At the end of the day we could have snuggling time if both weren’t watching two different TVs. While technology and a busy schedule do have an impact on loneliness, they aren’t the only reasons we can feel lonely.
Parenting can take it’s toll on you, long, hard days leave parents longing for quiet. Sometimes this means one or both parents pull away from one another. Nighttime becomes a separation of the two God designed to be one. Instead of spouses drawing together to gain strength from each other, they fall apart and one (or both) find themselves lonely and exhausted.
Living alone and having no one by your side creates loneliness that few truly understand. When you do reach out time and time again with only heartbreak at the end, loneliness is often over taken by depression.
- Loneliness is a life killer. It takes away your joy, your desire to see and do new things, your passions…it takes away you.
- Loneliness is a step away from depression. If not replaced with relationships, activities you love and faith in God who never leaves you alone, you will begin to fight depression.
If you’re struggling with being lonely take a moment to evaluate your life.
- How much technology time do I have each day?
- Do I have open spaces in my days to build relationships – to spend time with family and friends.
- Am I pulling away from my spouse at the end of my day?
- When was the last time I did an activity I enjoy?
- How does my time with God look? Rushed? Limited?
If your answers were mostly (or all) to the negative side, make the decision AND commit to changing your life.
While we won’t eliminate all the times we are lonely, we can change our lives to lessen them and focus on the Lord and lean on Him through the hard, lonely times in our days.
Being lonely doesn’t have to be your state of life. God calls us to live abundantly. When we don’t know how, we must seek Him.