Being Real: Adultery

This world is full of wickedness and just because you’re a Christian does not shield you from all of it. We are surrounded by the world and all the sin that abounds on a daily basis, add to that the “target” that Satan puts on Christians and we truly must battle to live for the Lord at times. Jesus told us that it would be this way in John 15.

In John 15:18 Jesus says, “If the world hate you, ye know that it hated me before it hated you.”



Adultery Begins in the Heart and Mind

Adultery doesn’t just happen. It had to start somewhere. It isn’t just a decision you make on a whim and just run with it. There is history behind this sinful, heartbreaking decision. Though you may not realize it building, adultery actually begins in your heart…you long for something more…you aren’t satisfied with what God has given you… Then you begin to think that surely the grass is greener on the other side…

Jesus tells us in Matthew 15:19 & 20, “For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts, murders, adulteries, fornications, thefts, false witness, blasphemies: These are the things which defile a man: but to eat with unwashen hands defileth not a man.”

The heart is where adultery begins…the mind is where it continues to grow…

Adultery Doesn’t Require Physical Relations

In this world it is hard to walk down the street and not be hit with indecently clad women or shirtless men. Somehow our society has allowed a decrease in clothing to be acceptable with each year that passes it seems. It is becoming harder for men and women to keep their eyes safe from being caught looking a person of the opposite sex with interest. If we are not careful we can get caught lusting after that which our human eyes find appealing or desirable. We must remember what Jesus said about lust of the eyes and adultery.

Matthew 5:28 states, “But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart.”

We must guard our eyes and ensure that we are focused on the Lord, clothed for the battle of our hearts and minds with God’s Word as our sword to combat the times that our flesh becomes weak.

Adultery Can Be Found in Your Home

It’s true. With a click of your mouse, every sexual evil can enter your eyes, the eyes of your spouse or God forbid even your child. While the internet can be a wonderful tool, there is more evil to be found than good I must tell you. From online sex chat rooms to online videos, forums to sex phone lines and more, the possibilities for adultery in your heart and mind abound online.

It is becoming increasingly important to filter your computer’s internet programs, pop-ups, etc. We must ensure our children are safe when they are online as well, this does not just include PCs and laptops, many of these avenues and others are available on tablets, cell phones, etc. As parents we need to protect them even if it means they don’t like us sometimes.

Adultery May Seem Good for a Time

After all doesn’t all sin go that way? Human nature is that if it looks good, sounds good and/or feels good to us, then it’s worth it. ¬†God’s word tells us that the pleasures of sin last only a season…

Hebrews 11:25b states, “enjoy the pleasures of sin for a season.”

Just like with all sin though the end is not pleasureful. Adultery ends with pain, heartache and broken relationships…some of which never heal.


Your marriage…your family…your relationship with the Lord are much more important than a moment’s pleasure. The lasting memory and disgust will never leave you though the years pass by.

Remember your heart is where it all begins so…

“Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.” (Prov. 4:23)


About Misty Leask

Misty is a Daughter of THE King, Texas girl always, Navy brat at heart, loving Fisherman's wife, blessed mother of 2. She is passionate about being real throughout all of life's struggles, successes and dreams. Her heart is full of ideas and passions, but the hours in her day never multiply to get it all done. Misty loves writing and reading in her spare time. Music and photography are favorite past times of hers as well.


Being Real: Adultery — 8 Comments

  1. Misty,

    This is a great post on the beginnings of adultery. I am studying this now because I am about to do a series on lust and young women – which is not often discussed. Lust is the root of adultery, as you noted, and if lust is destroyed, the danger of adultery is so much less. Modesty is also a part of this. I wrote about that topic in my post ‘That Day I Wore Yoga Pants: Five Myths of Modesty’.
    Thanks for the great post!

    • Yes, so very true. Lust is where it all begins. It must be stopped at the beginning or it will likely continue to spread throughout ones life. Praying for you as you write on such an important topic.

  2. Although pornography and immodestly dressed women don’t make things easier for men I personally think the root of adultery is more about coveting than lust (and not to mention it kind of blames women). And while you say adultery doesn’t just happen on a whim and it starts as lust I think most of it more accurately starts as a (seemingly innocent) relationship that is actually inappropriate in its depth between two unmarried people of the opposite sex. I don’t know one case of adultery in my personal life that was actually about sex or even really about looks (lust). I know several people who were caught in adultery however that got there by spending large amounts of time alone inappropriately with someone of the opposite sex. Sometimes it was work projects that they did have to work on. Sometimes it was just built under the guise of venting about spouses. Having gone through adultery (my ex-husband of 10 years is bipolar and had several emotional affairs and then several physical affairs before I decided I can’t be god for him and I can’t put myself back in that situation to be hurt by him again since he refuses to take meds and well, even keep a job, a real winner I know), I personally think that lust has very little to do with it although the pornography and lust perhaps do have to do with desensitizing towards it, and I think it’s highly unlikely that anyone enters into adultery under the guise of “it will be a good time”. I think more likely instead of facing things they need to change about themselves they focus in on what they think their spouse should change and decide it would be easier to work out with this person instead, this person would be a fix of the problems they have with their own spouse. And sometimes there is a “love addiction” where they are addicted to the feelings of a new lover and so when the initial sparks fade they think they weren’t really in love and they need to find the real person they can love forever. Just some thoughts.

    • While I agree with much of what you’re saying, I personally have dealt with adultery that didn’t come from large amounts of time with someone of the opposite sex and did come from serious issues of lust. It can most definitely start with coveting and spending a lot of time with someone of the opposite sex is not wise, though none of these are the only ways adultery can occur. Each person is unique and what sexually appeals to one individual does not necessarily apply to another.

      It is extremely important that we all keep our hearts with all diligence, for they are deceitful and our minds must be focused on Christ so that we are not easily swayed. I’m sorry for the pain that your ex-husband put you through and will be praying for your healing.

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