This journey called grief is not for the faint of heart. As with any journey you embark on there are high and low points along the way, but you can’t see them until you are right on top of them. There are so many unknown possibilities on a journey that if we’re not careful we’ll find ourselves worrying about the negative and forget that there are amazing experiences and memories waiting to be made as well.
Grief is a painful journey, but there is hope. Even if it is just a glimmer sometimes, there is always hope in the midst of the pain.
Each morning that I wake up I find myself trying to begin my day, but unsure of what steps I need to take. If it weren’t for my to-do lists I doubt that I would have completed anything of consequence by bedtime. I know that I have things to accomplish, tasks that need to be completed, but I haven’t figured out how to move from one task to the next successfully yet. Some days are better than others, but I know it is time to start really living again. I can’t live in my yesterdays, so I must start living my life today…in my new reality.
How I’m Learning to Grieve with Hope This Week
Reality. I don’t know many people that really like that word. When I consider the word ‘reality’ I think of leaving dreams behind, dealing with the choices/mistakes you’ve made, coming back down to earth from an amazing experience, etc. None of that sounds exciting to me. In fact, it sounds completely depressing.
The truth is reality is just the life we have today. Many things and people in our lives contribute to our reality. The choices we make affect our reality. Things that happen outside of our control even impact our reality. Both good and bad things contribute to our reality. For some reason though, we tend to only think of reality in a negative way.
Reality is life…just as it is today.
As I’m preparing to take the next step on my journey, towards living life in my new reality I find myself taking a lot of deep breaths. I know I must go. I know what I must do. The hardest part comes first…the letting go of things we did together.
My new reality requires living life without one of my best friends. It means that I have to begin the process of letting go of things we did together because she isn’t here to do them with me anymore. I can’t simply continue doing things because we used to do them together. If I were to just continue doing them I would be putting off an important part of the healing process.
You can’t begin move forward while clinging to the past.
Honestly, this is not a step on my grief journey that I want to take. The thought of letting go of anything that holds a memory of her is extremely painful. Yet, I know that this is a step that I must take…she would want me to take it.
My new reality does shine with a glimmer of hope. I have the opportunity to honor her by living out the biggest lesson that she taught me and passing it on to others. I want to love Jesus with every breath I breathe…just like she did.
This step on my grief journey is one that I know would make her smile. It is what she would want the most from her life. Pointing others to Jesus was what her life was all about.
I’ve known for most of my life that I haven’t ever handled grief properly. That is why I began this journey towards learning to grieve with hope with my besties. We’re in the midst of our book study through Grieving with Hope, by Samuel J. Hodges.
Every week we’ll each be sharing our thoughts on the same chapter. It is our hope and prayer that as we learn to grieve holding tightly to the hope we have in Jesus Christ that others will be encouraged and strengthened that are on their own grief journey.
You can follow my journey towards grieving with hope here.
